Sunday, October 31, 2010

Issue Five and One-Quarter, Halloween Spectacular

From the Desk of the Editor,

     Welcome to the Halloween Spectacular Edition of Streets Ahead Magazine! Its been a busy week for me as I went to a journalism/writing conference in Kentucky (not Louisiana as previously thought). I will be posting transcribed notes from the conference on various topics from blogging tips, how to layout a print magazine, and how to publish a novel (by the way, I want to be Max McCoy when I grow up) to my writing blog on Concerning Fiction in the weeks to come.

     I hope you all enjoy the first ever SAM choose-your-own-adventure and have a happy Halloween!

Daniel "Kiddy" Pool

Trick or Treat, or Else


The killer, clad in black, crept behind the heroine. His hand grasps the knife till his veins bulged and the music intensifies. The pipe organ's shill cry joins the violin's lament. She won't see him coming, but then...


The sound of the door bell makes you jump.

“Are you going to get that?” asks Ted from the couch.

Well? Are you?

--to answer the door go to II.
--to ignore it and see what happens in the movie go to III.


You get up from your relaxing recliner to answer the door for yet another trope of trick-or-treaters. There never seems to be any children out on Halloween, but tonight has been busy.

You go to the front and retrieve the candy bowl. Opening the door you see a little witch, a wolf-man, and a vampire. They say together in chorus, “Trick or treat!”

--to say “Treat” go to IV.
--to say “Trick” go to VI.


You shrug off Ted's remark and continue watching I Saw What You Screamed About Last Friday the 13th Part IV, Oblivion. 
The killer raises the knife over his head and is about to strike down the heroine when she sees his reflection in a mirror. She dodges the knife, catching part of her under shirt, and kicks the villain in the groin. He cries out in pain and drops the knife. She grabs it and rushes toward him when...


It's persistent trick-or-treaters ring the door bell again.

--to answer the door go to II
--to continue to ignore them go to V.


When you look in the candy dish to hand out sweets you notice that it is almost empty. The only thing left is the caramel fudge brownies (your very favorite snack food) and gum (of the dried out truck-stop verity).

--if you give them your caramel fudge brownies then scroll to VII.
--if you give them dried out bubble gum then go to VI.


You finish the movie. Everyone but the heroine dies, except for maybe the villain who may yet cling to life for yet another sequel. You pick up the paper plates and put them in the trash in the kitchen when you see three sets of eyes watching you from the kitchen window.

The eyes dart into the distance and you couldn't make out what they were.

--to chock it up to teenage angst, whatever it is, and go to bed go to part VIII
--to go outside and investigate what it was go to part IX
--to call the police go to part X
--to get Ted go to part XI


The trio of children look at the dingy pink wads of crap that you hand them. You think that they just want more so you put more in their bags, but they withdraw their bags and the vampire slams down the candy dish with anger.

“Insolent peasant, do not offend my tastes with that of dried out gum!” cries the vampire.

--to give in and give them the caramel fudge brownies go to VII.
--to say, “Its good for your jaw muscles, now get lost,” go to XII.
--to slap the little snot and go back to your movie then go to V.


The little monsters look at the caramel fudge brownies with pure joy.

“Thank you so much!” they say and you never see them again, but your house still gets TP'ed.

The End... you're boring...

You shrug but remember that you are very sleepy, so you head to bed.

Your room is chilly. You get extra blankets and snuggle into them. Once you finally find a comfortable position, you slowly start to drift off. Until you hear a light scratching at your door.

'It's probably just Ted being a jerk,' you think, but you keep hearing it.

You keep hearing the weird scratching until you can't take it any longer and you decide to do something about it.

--to get a baseball bat from your closet go to XII
--to open the door go to XIII
--to take a sleeping aid and ignore it go to XIV.


Dew collects on every surface as you step outside. The porch light casts long shadows across the lawn. You cannot see anything moving in the shadows.

You were about to go back inside because of the cool nigh air, but you see something in the grass, tracks in the dew. Big dog tracks that lead up to the kitchen window and out toward an abandoned house next to yours.

--to go back inside go to XV
--to go to the abandoned house go to XVI


You pick up the phone and start to dial emergency services, but there is a problem. Your phone is either broken or your service is out. Sucks to be you.

--to get Ted go to XI
--to chock it up to teenage angst, whatever it is, and go to bed go to VIII
--to go outside and investigate what it was go to IX


You knock on the bathroom door.

“What do you want? I'm taking a dump,” he answers.

'That's weird,' you think, 'Ted doesn't usually sound like that.'

--to force your way into the bathroom go to XVII
--to chock it up to teenage angst, whatever it is, and go to bed go to VIII
--to go outside and investigate what it was go to IX


To your shock you don't own a bat, or a child size vampire doll... And you wouldn't keep it in your closet... and such a doll (if you owned one) would not be able to throw itself onto you and bite your neck with the grace of a mating ox.

You wake up in your bed. It was just a bad dream that a child sized vampire doll came to life and bite you on the neck. Phew, cause that would be scary. Anyway you are starving.

--to go get some breakfast go to XVIII
--to stay in bed longer go to XVIII


Nothing is there. Weird stuff. Now the scratching is in the closet.

--to take a sleeping aid and ignore it go to XII.
--to get Ted go to XI
--to open your closet go to XII


You whirl around to open the door, but it's lock. You must have locked yourself out dumb-ass. Your only choice will be to run around to the front door or go to the abandoned house.


You walk toward the abandoned house. The grass is wet with dew and it soaks through your shoes. The chill of the icy dampness freezes you to the bone.

The house stands in front of you (which is creepy enough considering it since it doesn't have legs). It is a brilliant shade of lavender. A gust of wind shakes the whole house; causing it to shimmer (with anticipation).

As you follow the tracks on to the porch of the house the door swings open. As you start to step into the house you hear a howl from behind you. Looking back you see something in the shadows between your yard and you.

--to go inside the house go to XIX
--to take on the shadow creature go to XX


You force your way into the bathroom. The weak fiber-wood gives easy.

As you smash into the pink title room you are overwhelmed by the smell of blood. You would question how you know that the smell is blood for sure, except for the fact that the walls were soaked in it.

On the toilet the half-eaten body of the Ted is slumped against the bowl. Standing over his remains was the little witch. Blood dripped down her chin and arms.

“Trick-or-treat!” she shrikes.

You slam the door shut. Then you curse a few times. How the hell are you going to clean that up? Also what in the hell are you going to do. Think quick, you can't the door close all night.

--to think of a plan go to XXI
--to grab your baseball bat go to XII
--to run to you room go to XXI
--to go outside go to IX
--to get the candy dish to “Treat” her go to XXI


You pull back the covers and stretch big. Looks like it will be a great day, except your neck hurts. Rubbing it your hand comes back with two streaks of blood.

You pull a mirror off you bedside table. When you look for yourself you cannot. You have no reflection.

“Raise and shine!” yells Ted from the wall sized picture windows. The incoming sun ignites your body into flames. As you die you roll of your bed to escape the sun. Ted screams and the smell of singed human hair fills your senses.

As you pull yourself away from the light, you still choke on the stink of your melting flesh that you breathe and die.

The End... till the cure for death is discovered.


The sting of fear shoots up your spine at the sight of the shadowy figure. You thunder up the steps, each movement in conjunction with the your heart pounding in your chest. The threshing of heavy feet on the lawn and heavy breathing tell you that whatever is behind you is racing you to the door.

You reach out and grab the handle of the door and start to close it behind you. As you start to pull it shut the door slams under the weight of the shadowy creature. Claws on wood fill your ears.

The house is amber yellow and empty. Like the husk of a locust, the house looks like the skeleton of a house.

Ahead of you is a hallway leading to a turn. Strange lights dance on the wall down the hall. To your left is a living room that leads to a kitchen. To your right is nothing. Behind you is the front door, and the monster.

--to lock the door go to XXII
--to go down the hallway go to XXIII
--to go into the living room go to XXIV


You turn to take on the shadowy creature. Red eyes meet yours in defiance. It huffs and rushes at you.

Balling your fists you run at it screaming. It lets out a howl and takes off on all fours. The two of you clash.

You get a few good hits on its head, but it has claws and fangs. You put up a good fight, but you get devoured. Sucks to be you.

The End... Better luck next time you bring fists to a claw fight.


You leave the bathroom door in desperation to find something to end this nightmare. As your take the pressure of your body off the door it swings open.

“I will take pleasure in feasting on you!” says the witch.

You try to run but you are frozen with fear. Her lips move but no sound comes out. Then she begins to eat you while you stand still watching her. You die a violent, slow, and grueling death. Great job dummy, you got ate.

The End, get out of here.


You turn to lock the door, but there is no lock on this side. Weird.

--to go down the hallway go to XXIII
--to go into the living room go to XXIV


Walking down the hallway, you notice that the house is not completely devoid of furnishings. Along the walls are hung photographs of small children. Each seems to watch you as you move down the hall.

Reaching the end of the hall you can either go to the right toward several bedrooms or go to the left into what looks like the kitchen and dining room.

--to go left go to XXV
--to go right go to XXVI


The living room is covered in pink-flower carpet. You noticed that hundreds of candles line the wall, each flickering in a different light. The living room turns into a lackluster dining room. Guess there is only one way to go.

--walk into the kitchen go to XXV


Walking into the kitchen you realize that two things. Firstly, that the wallpaper looks like something that would be on the inside of a doll-house. It has little flowers and twisting vines. The second thing you notice is that it is covered in blood.

Tendrils of gore hang from every counter and cupboard. In the center of the room is a large iron cauldron fizzing with pink and green smoke. You swallow to keep the acid from your stomach from reaching your mouth as the smell of cooking flesh washes over you.

No one (or thing) is in the room with you, or so you thought. As you stand near the door a hand reaches out of the cauldron and claw at the lip.

Behind the cauldron is the back door. If you make a run for it maybe you could make it back outside.

--to help whoever is in the pot go to XXVI
--to make a break for the back door go to XXVII


You grab the burning flesh of whoever is in the pot. You drag whoever it is out of the smoking fluid using all of your might. As their head clears the smoke you can make out it is Ted.

“Run! Before it is too late...” he says, then he chokes on his own tongue and his face melts off.

You let go of him in shock.

“Trick or treat,” says a chilly voice from behind you!

As you turn it is the little witch. You turn to run but small hands from a little werewolf and vampire child grab you with impossible force and drunk you into the cauldron. They hold you there as you drown on the acid and poison.

The End, unless you learn to breathe acid...


You run for the back door. As you reach the door the werewolf trick-or-treater steps into the doorway. You turn to run but the witch and the vampire appear at the living room and hallway entrances respectively. They slowly move you toward the center of the room and begin to chant, “Trick or treat, trick or treat...”


--Trick? XXVIII
--Treat? XXVIX


As they eat you, the thought 'is this a dream?' enters your mind. You try to wake up, forcing your eyes open you realize the little children are still eating you. Tough luck,

The End, or at least it will be when they are done eating you...


You feel them chewing and clawing you apart, you feel their little hands all over you as you squirm to free yourself. Then a single hand touches your hand that is more... real? The hand is stronger and more forceful and it shakes you.

“Hey, its your turn to get the door. Hey. Hey? Wake up, there are trick or treaters at the door,” says Ted.

You must have fallen asleep watching the movie. The credits are rolling up the screen to rock music.

You get up from the couch and answer the door. Standing on your doorstep is a little vampire, witch, and werewolf.

“Trick or treat!” they yell, smiling.

Happy Halloween!

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